During our lifetime we will meet so many people. Some of these people will go onto be life-long friends, partners, beacons of support whilst some of them will drift away and become strangers. You may find yourself in situations where you’re fighting to be heard by a friend or when your views don’t align with those around you, and It’s during these testing times that our true friends are revealed and the fake ones are exposed.
Throughout lockdown I have been learning to accept that people come and go. People who you’ve previously trusted, invested your time into and people who you thought would be in your life forever suddenly aren’t there anymore. When this has happened to me I’ve often questioned my actions and have jumped to the conclusion that I’ve done something wrong to make my ‘friend’ not want to talk to me. However, this couldn’t be further from the truth.
As we go through different stages of our lives it’s normal for our support sytems and those around us to change. As we figure out our own ways in life our social settings evolve and the people surrounding us change.
In my own experince these changes have left me feeling upset, alone and worthless. I’ve assumed that people never really wanted to be friends with me in the first place and that I’m a horrible person who is not worth being around.
I’ve recently been in a situation where I’ve found myself questioning my worth because my friendship group altered. I instantly assumed that because the people surrounding me no longer spoke to me I’d done something wrong and no one would ever want to be friends with me again. However, as I took a step back and assessed the situation I realised that it’s not my fault that things with my friends didn’t work out. Looking back I’ve realised that these people weren’t my people. They weren’t singing from the same song sheet and I really didn’t fit in with them.
I want to write this post to remind you that it’s inevitable that throughout your life your friends will change. It’s nothing personal and it’s not a reflection on who you are. These changes may be difficult to manage and you may initially question your worth but believe that everything happens for a reason. You have the power to curate a safe, happy, supportive environment and if those around you aren’t making you feel secure then it’s okay to walk away.
Go out there and find your tribe. Find the people that make YOU happy and that make YOU feel accepted.
B x
Being Boo 